Stress Reliever # 1

Hubby: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?

Wife: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at Your picture and the problem disappear.

Hubby: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?

Wife: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, What other problems can there be greater than this one

Stress Reliever # 2

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.

Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.

Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.

Stress Reliever # 3

Wife to Husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"

Husband to Wife: "Golfing with friends, my dear."

Wife to Husband: "What? At 2 a.m?!"

Husband to Wife: "Yes, We used night clubs."

Stress Reliever # 4

A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you -- NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"

Stress Reliever # 5

Father to son after exam: "Let me see your report card."

Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."

Stress Reliever # 6

"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate.

"Terrible!" the roommate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."

"Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"

"He was the original owner."

Stress Reliever # 7

A teacher asked her class for sentences using theword "beans".

"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.

Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."

Stress Reliever # 8

Teacher: Let's take the example of the busy ant. He is busy all the time, works all day and every day. Then what happens?

Little Johnny: He gets stepped on.

Stress Reliever # 9

Interviewer: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire to ?"

Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."

Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you Married her?"

Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

Stress Reliever # 10

A Chinese waitress in a sushi bar notices a Japanese man looking intently at her. As she passes his table, he says to her, "What's up babe?" in a heavy Japanese accent. She ignores his flirtation. The next time she walks near his table, he does the same thing. He strives to make and hold eye contact with her and repeats his question: "What's up babe?" Once again, she ignores him. The proprietor has noticed this and approaches the waitress and asks her "What is that man asking you for?" The waitress tells him, "He keeps asking me 'What's up babe?'". Her boss responds: "He's not asking how you're doing, he wants some Wasabi!"