SOMEBODY SAID
Somebody said a mother is an unskilled laborer ... somebody never gave a squirmy infant a bath.

Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby ... somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, normal is history.

Somebody said a mother's job consists of wiping noses and changing diapers ... somebody doesn't know that a child is much more than the shell he lives in.

Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct ... somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.

Somebody said being a mother is boring ... somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.

Somebody said teachers, psychologists and pediatricians know more about children than their mothers ... somebody hasn't invested her heart in another human being.

Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out" ... somebody thinks a child is like a bag of plaster of Paris that comes with directions, a mold and a guarantee.

Somebody said being a mother is what you do in your spare time ... somebody doesn't know that when you're a mother, you're a mother ALL the time.

Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices ... somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child wind up and hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.

Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother ... somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.

Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first ... somebody doesn't have five children.

Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books ... somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose.

Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery ... somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.

Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back ... somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.

Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married ... somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.

Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home ... somebody never had grandchildren.

Somebody said being a mother is a side dish on the plate of life ... somebody doesn't know what fills you up.

Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her ... somebody isn't a mother.